IGNORANCE is Bliss. HAPPINESS is a choice

Hello everyone,

I am taking the banner of IGNORANCE from now on wards. Why ? Because, I have learn that ignoring and not bothering is the key to happiness. (",) I guess all of us can never truly be free from unreasonable and nasty people be it at work, play and yes, even within our own haven - our family. It seems for the first time that escaping and fleeing makes perfect sense. Indeed, when it comes to facing people that you care about, but are unreasonable and nasty, the best step forward is to ignore.

However, there is a thin line between ignoring and being an easy step-over. Hence, that's where the seng-mok-ness ( meaning shrewd/wise in cantonese, with a "ness" to depict theory) should start to arise from the hidden recesses of one's emotional mechanism of self-dignity and self-protection.

To ignore doesn't mean to appear indifferent, and feeling damn "bang" inside your own heart. (ie. to be really upset and frustrated about the situation) The art of ignoring is appearing indifferent, and also feeling calm, collected, with a "huh??" attitude.

Not being affected is the key. Remaining non-chalant about it is the primary factor... Its like walking past a chained-up dog that is barking at everyone that walked past it. There are a few reactions that people might take.

1) You might take offence at it, thinking... "gosh! the dog probably thinks i'm a bad person, that's why its barking at me", or "man! that dog hates me, it keeps barking at me." *feeling damn bang*

(of course, the truth is far from that. The dog was barking at EVERYONE that walked past it.)
Moral : Why get affected ? If you can't see the complete picture and understand, ignore. Does it really matter that the dog is barking at you ? For all you know, the dog might be hurling abuses at you for no reasons. Are you hurt in anyway ? NO, you are not. Ignore. And walk away.

2. Another attitude that you might take is to wonder why its barking in that manner. Its probably mad, you would think. And walk on, not being affected, and continuing your walk.

(That's the exact attitude that I will learn to adopt. )
Moral : No harm done. I dont' see the complete picture, and there is no need for me to know because it doesn't concern me. Even if I am able to see the complete picture, I can't make that dog stop barking can I ?

Of course, you might say that its a barking dog... precisely. Unreasonable people are just like the barking dog depicted. . .

Its strange that we let the nastiness and unreasonable-ness, be it a total stranger or someone that we are close to get to us. Could it be the mindset that we have, that is, if we treat other people nice, others are suppose to recipocrate that sort of benevolence, or cordial-ness, or friendliness....

Unfortunately, this is not the case. So many experiences in life prove us wrong, but yet, the resilient nature of such a mentality still remains. I'm not saying that it is a wrong mindset... on the contary, it is goood thinking. If only everyone thinks that way.... If someone treats me nice, I should recipocrate. But, sadly, this isn't happening either. There's always others that think that they are a cut-above the rest, and they deserve to be treated this way by default while they step on everyone else as they move along.

"No harm done"... they bemused... "I am the KING/PARENT/BOSS/OLDER SIBLLING/YOUNGEST/MOST-DOTED-UPON, and I DESERVE to be treated this way." or, "I MUST have my way irregardless of anyone"...

Yes, unfortunately, society still find many an individual having such thoughts. Believing and abiding such a stand when reacting and behaving to the people around them.

Ladies and genltmen, we can't change such an adverse mindset, can we ? However, we are also not going to get ourselves bulldozed by such thinking either. Or, much worse, to be affected and unhappy about such a nonsensical behaviour of unreasonable people. Hence, the best approach - ignore.

Why do we get upset over other people's insecurities or snobbishness or spoiltness ? Why does their insolence affect us ? Why do we feel unjustified by their unreasonable and tactless outbursts? We should take pride at ourselves that at least we are not the ones that are unreasonable and demeaning other people. That's stage one... knowing that we don't belong to such a category, and neither are we on the same page as them. *PHEW!*

It is much responsibility to understand and see situations clearly. To behave in a way that will aid in the situation, and not lash out and act childishly and unreasonably. That is being responsible.

It takes much more responsibility to have wisdom, to understand and comprehend human relations. To respect others, and to be polite to others. Be it towards stranger, colleagues, family, friends. It is irresponsible to hail profanities, yell or demand others to do as according to our whims and fancies, just because we think we deserve to be treated that way.

It is this same wisdom that we exercise, when, to ignore other's injustice done unto us or to the people we care about. It is also with this same wisdom to understand why these same unreasonable people are behaving in this way.

Indeed, it is not easy to swallow such behaviour.. But, understand that it is not humble pie that we are eating, but rather, when we choose to understand and empathise the other party's unreasonable motives, we see a larger picture. And, at the end of it all, we know that we have choosen happiness by understanding and ignoring such insolence.

At the end of the day - what can these same unreasonable folks get from us ? A smile perhaps. But that's about it. Bottom line, they will not get what they want --- that is for us to get upset and angry enough to retaliate and recipocrate their outbursts. To be rude and nasty. In the end, we become manipulated by these same people that we scoff at for their nasty and rude behaviour. And, we become... THEM.

We must not let the unwanted "virus" spread. A word of wisdom as a rebuttal - yes. (that's when seng-mok-ness come into play)

But, bare in mind - lets not pass this "rude/nasty/unreasonable" bug around. Its not worth it. Happiness is a choice. We should learn to ignore, and choose to be happy.

That's what my God taught me. That's what I shall learn.

(nb : feel free to comment/share your thoughts. I'm toying with this idea and how we should react and behave toward others. Its always good to analyse and discuss.)