A Spin off From another Blog - Fairy Tales ?

Was reading a blog today, the blogger was sighting that Fairy Tales equate to Airy Tales. Its sad to don on such a perspective about childhood. That it mean nothing. Her childhood's probably fine, but sometimes, certain things happen later in life to cause us to pick on the less-perfect things out of our childhood. Most of us, if not all of us, have certain things in our childhood that has cause some kind of "trauma" or whatsoever. And with that, we stigmatise certain things in life in our later years after childhood. Somehow, this fear that has grown in us ( probably evolving into some other characteristic in our behaviourial trait) and made us into who we are and how we grew up to be.

Was it our parents to be blamed for causing us to grow up in insecurity ? Was it them who has build such an environment for us to grow up in? (note that we are only segregating the less-then-perfect things that are passed down from parents, not the countless marvelous things that we have been blessed by family/parents)

I have no answer to that. I pondered.

Maybe they did. Maybe they didn't.

Even if they did, I reckon that it was something that was done unintentionally. Like the saying goes... all man are flawed. If they would have known that what they do when they are angry could marr our adult life in one way or another, they would have chose to steer clear of what they did. But then again, emotions are something that is difficult to control ... one might say that they wouldn't feel this way or that. But, in the trueness of nature... can one actually say that they don't feel a certain way when certain things are being done? If they manage to, would that be a surpressed feeling??? Much more dangerous when one does that ?

Pondering...

I try to answer the question by putting "Maybe, they didn't"... somehow, it was tough for me to justify that parents have nothing to do with this. Bad experiences in childhood affects the child. Period.

As much good experiences a child goes through in his/her younger years... it doesn't seem to leave that deep an imprint as compared to something "bad"that the child has experienced.

With that statement, it worries me. I wonder what sort of environment that WE - the 20somethings/30somethings, the new mummies/daddies, the potential mummies/daddies - might build for our children. How will the children of Dawn Teo/Yeo, Daphne whatever or that SarongPartyGirl blogger will grow up to be ? The first two are ultra angels (?).. that's what the media tell us, and the other the degenerate. What can we say of them? Whatever they are, angel or demon.. visuallising them as parents are ... well... a scary thought. How about picturing your peer as a mother, or father... scares you doesn't it? Well.. it makes me wonder if my own peers can be called good daddies/mummies. I'm not making the comment or judgement if these people - or rather WE - make bad parents.

I know some really good parents. Parents that are mums and dads to my peers. But yet, it seems that these children of these good parents still harbour fear/trauma/stigma on certain things in life. Sigh.. What does it take to make/ bring up children to be perfect???

I reckon the answer is - None. If one doesn't grow up having fears -- one will never learn on life's trials .. there's be no battles to fight in life. What will that make us ? Social maimes ? We need to fight to be alife. Battles that are healthy - that are challenging us beyond ourselves - that will help us to learn, to see better. I wouldn't want to have ears that do not hear, and eyes that do not see.

Will I make a good parent ? Will you make a good parent? Will Dawn Yeo/Teo, Daphne Whatever or SarongPartyGirl make a good parent?

WHO CARES ???!!!

Its not the parents that make the journey - its the child. It is up to the child to live well and learn well. To know that these fears or airy tales from childhood are indeed .. just.. airy tales... things to overcome..